Man, she is stepping on me! And I mean she’s very much doing so! She’s all over me! Can she not sense this is not the floor, for crying out loud?! What’s wrong with these people, do they not watch their steps? I mean… seriously! And the worse thing is: I have to put up with it as I’m just a foot and foot doesn’t speak… no voice comes out for me to complain. Ha! But I can move my toes, la la la la la!! I bet that will make them tumble. Ha, ha, ha, that is the positive part of not having a mouth: when I want, I just burst out laughing right in front of someone and they have absolutely no idea that they are being fooled. It’s such a joyous and liberating feeling. Now, back to the little person… Let’s just watch how she goes when I shake myself. NOW! Ha, ha, ha!! Amazingly funny! It was only when I shook me that I felt a little other fella embrancing my leg as he almost fell down. Oh, please, just look at him. He is in that pathetic “oh-dear-lord-please-help-me” position. I almost feel for him. And now what?! I feel maybe a hand trying to reach my toes? What the hell… what is going on around here today? Have things completely gone out of control? And I was just looking forward to a peaceful, relaxing day. I hope the hand at least gives me a massage, come on!

Oh no! She is gonna fall down! I am screamin here with my mouth wide open so somebody may please help her!! Oh! Help them! There is a little boy by her side. This foot, he is mean and full of shit. Why must he fuss and scare people away? Come on, guys! I am just a screaming head, can anybody do something, please?!

Oh, sushhh, be quiet already! We all heard you. You are like the biggest thing here: a giant screaming head. I am the hand holding the foot, if you could just look down and stop the screaming, you would see. I made sure the two little lost souls up there won’t fall or be taken out of the picture. Just stop agitating the scenario otherwise the foot will start getting ideas that I’m here to rub him. A big scary foot like this? Yeah, right, keep wishing, big one, keep wishing…

My preeeeeeecioooouuuuuussssssssss! Come here! Come back here! What are you doing chasing this little girl around for? You are mine! Mine!! I found you! You are MY precious butterfly, fly back here! Ooohhhh, pleaaaaaaaase? Please come back. Would you like to play? Or I know! We can dance! I can get up from this walking-on-my-hands-and-feet position, change my hairstyle and dance with you! That would be fun, we can pretend you are chasing me instead of that silly, stupid girl, huh! Preciooouuusss, iu-huuu, prrrrrrrrecious! Look at me! I don’t everyone teasing me, calling me Gollum anymore! My name is Smeagol! Pleeeeease, precious, fly to me. You do want to be found!

It’s funny, the baby is kicking so much today, it is as if it’s hearing too many voices or sounds. It is as if it’s interacting with a whole world inside my belly. I felt it sleeping earlier today and the weirdest thing is that every time it moves, it feels it went back to the exact the same position as before. I know… I must sound a little insane by telling you this, but may I have the benefit of the doubt on this one? It is sleeping, but it’s also troubled. Oh, well, maybe I will give birth to a very talkative, sleepy and creative little one!

I can’t see anything! Can you? I feel I’m being watched by floating heads and bodies but I just can’t see them or, as a matter of fact, I can’t see a thing! Oh, no! They placed me facing backwards to everyone and everything… oh no indeed! What a horrible sin I must have committed to face this awful punishment forever! I am here stranded unable to see but feel I am constantly being watched, not even knowing where I am stepping on (and it does feel yuckie, whatever this is), managing my balance by holding something that could be an old man’s beard or a tree’s liana. Thank the heavens for my strong and well built calves – well, maybe my legs are this strong simply because I have been for… how long now? And how for much longer…?